Before You Decide Ask This

I need your help with this. I’m going to say a phrase, and I want you to fill in the blank. You can say it out loud—go ahead.

"Actions speak louder than..."
What? Okay.

"Two wrongs don't..."
Right.

"Better safe..."
Yeah.

This one I hate the most: "The early bird..."
Yeah, I’m not a morning person.

"Beggars can't be..."
Right.

"Honesty is the..."
Exactly.

"Don't judge a book..."
Yup.

One more. I heard this one a lot growing up:
"If you have nothing nice to say..."
Exactly.

You've clearly heard many of those. We've heard short sayings like that from parents, grandparents, teachers, and even in church. They were trying to give us little bits of wisdom to help us make good decisions—or stop making bad ones. Some of those sayings have likely stuck with you over time. They’re meant to help us navigate life wisely.

God, who created the world by wisdom—as Scripture says—left us His words in the Bible, so that we can follow and apply His wisdom to our lives. And in that collection of books, one stands out as especially rich in wisdom: the book of Proverbs.

Open your Bible to Proverbs. It’s a fascinating book—poetic in style, with short, concise sayings that offer deep wisdom. These sayings are meant to help us navigate decisions and live godly lives. They’re not just clever quotes—they’re memorable because they’re true and practical.

Proverbs is a book largely attributed to Solomon, the wisest man to walk the earth. Over and over, Solomon says he’s writing to his sons. So, you get this idea of an experienced person passing wisdom to the inexperienced.

I'm close with my dad. On Father’s Day—which is also his birthday—I think of how I often ask for his advice. That’s what Proverbs feels like: someone wise sharing what they’ve learned, what mistakes to avoid, and what decisions to make.

But the goal isn’t just to hear the wisdom—it’s to live it. You’re not wise just because you know the words. You’re wise when you live them out.

If I had to sum up the book of Proverbs in three words: Don’t be foolish. Maybe in today’s terms: Don’t be dumb.

Later this summer, Tim Lewis is coming to speak about “Don’t Be Foolish About Adultery.” That fits right in with Proverbs—it’s full of warnings and practical advice. The core message? Don’t make choices that lead you somewhere you don’t want to end up. Don’t take a path that doesn’t align with God’s will.

One of my favorite summaries of Proverbs is: Good decisions for avoiding bad endings.

We all love happy endings, but sometimes, the most powerful stories are the cautionary ones—the ones that show what happens when things go wrong.

The first nine chapters of Proverbs are thematic. But from chapter 10 onward, it’s more like a collection of stand-alone bits of wisdom. It's scatterbrained in the best way—wisdom about everything: friendships, alcohol, money, relationships, speech, and more.

But remember this: Proverbs is a poetic book. That means its truths are general truths, not promises. They’re usually true—not always. Like:

“A slack hand causes poverty, but the hand of the diligent makes rich.”
—Proverbs 10:4

Generally speaking, yes—hard work leads to success. But we’ve all known lazy people who are wealthy and hard workers who struggle. Another example:

“Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.”

Yes, generally, if you raise your child in the Lord, they’ll continue that path. But it’s not a guarantee.

People today are hungry for this kind of wisdom. Take Jordan Peterson’s book 12 Rules for Life—it’s a bestseller because people crave clarity and direction. That’s what Proverbs offers.

So what’s the key to wisdom?

Let’s look at Proverbs 1:7:

“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction.”

This is the thesis statement of the entire book. You want wisdom? Start with fearing the Lord.

What does that mean—fear of the Lord? Some think it means being afraid of God’s power and judgment. Others say it means awe and reverence. I’d say it’s both. We should have a healthy fear, yes—but also deep respect and admiration for who God is.

Think of how people act differently when the principal walks into a classroom versus a substitute teacher. That’s the idea. Fear of the Lord is a healthy respect for God and His definition of good and evil.

Satan’s first tactic with Adam and Eve was to get them to question God’s definition of good and evil. That’s what we still do today. We want to define it ourselves. But the wise person says, “God knows better.”

And here’s what fear of the Lord does: it makes us teachable. The most foolish thing we can do is ignore God’s instruction. If no one can tell you anything—if you’re not coachable—you’re not wise.

So how do we apply this practically?

Ask yourself this one question:
“Is it wise?”

Not just “Is it sin?” Because if we only ask “Is it sin?” we get as close to the line as we can without crossing it. But Proverbs pushes us to ask, “Is it wise?”

Let’s use Lot as an example. Genesis 13:10–13 tells us he chose to move near Sodom. Was it sin? The Bible doesn’t say so. In fact, Lot is later called righteous.

But was it wise? No. That one decision led to disaster. He lost his wife. His daughters did unspeakable things. That move affected not just him—but the people he loved.

If Lot had just asked, “Is this wise?” he may have chosen differently.

The same is true for us. Flirting with sin is a dangerous game. Sin doesn’t just sit there—it grabs you. We’re not strong enough to live next to it and not be affected.

So, ask the better question: Is it wise?
Not just with big life decisions—but in relationships, finances, habits, and how we treat others.

You’ve probably heard of couples sharing social media accounts or choosing to never be alone with someone of the opposite sex outside their marriage. The world mocks that. But it’s wise. It guards against temptation and protects relationships.

Almost every bad decision—every affair, addiction, regret—could have been avoided if someone had just asked, “Is this wise?”

So, here’s the challenge:
Fear the Lord.
Ask, “Is this wise?”
And then live by the answer.

It’s not about perfection. We’ll mess up. But we don’t have to consistently make unwise choices. We can live better by God’s wisdom.

When I was a teen, every time I’d leave the house, my parents would say, “Be smart.” That’s Proverbs. That’s God’s call: Be wise.